Create a Novel Query Letter

What is a query letter? For that matter, what is a query? Webster defines it as a question, an inquiry. Let me give my definition. A query letter is a formal business letter revealing how an author will make money for an agency or publisher, quickly and easily. It is not a letter to your pal, nor is it an invitation to be entertained by your writing. It must appeal to the agent's business acumen, not their appreciation of the craft, nor their love of the art.

Agents prefer to receive a concise, one-page query letter that describes something brief about the novel's plot or distinguishing hook, the genre or category the offering is in, and other titles the author believes comparable. The letter should include basic information about the author, previous publishing credits, previous agent, significant writing awards, education, participation in writing groups, conferences, and any other distinguishing information relevant to his or her profile as an author.

Agents and editors reject ninety-nine percent of all queries submitted to them. What does this mean? It means the minimum quality level acceptable is perfect. I repeat perfect. No mistakes, none, nada, zip. Perfect.

If you're too lazy, too busy, or lack the skills, send only one copy. Send it to your mother. She loves you, doesn't she? Sending more is a waste of postage.

Furthermore, agents see thousands of query letters every year. Don't try to be cute. They've seen it. The first time it was cute. Now, it's the reason they'll reject your work. Silly fonts, colored paper, and bags of sugar-free candy don't work. Most will reject it out of hand. Ok, after they eat the candy. The odds are with them: ninety-nine to one.

'Nuff said.

There are several different categories for query letters. The category we will address is a query for a piece of fiction written by an unpublished author.

Long Fiction (Book) Query

The intended recipient of our letter is an agent. Although you can send it directly to a publisher, the odds are it will go unread if an agent does not represent you.

Using a standard business letter format, place your name, address, phone number, and email address in the appropriate place. Use a simple easy-to-read business font. If you're using the Wizards for Word Query wizard, the formatting and placement is automatic.

Address Block and Salutation

The next part is the name and address of the recipient. The address must be current. Spell the agent's name correctly. Many agents will stop reading on the first spelling error. Determine the correct gender of the agent. I met an agent named B.J. who was a woman. If I hadn't met her, I wouldn't have known. Visits to web sites and agent listing didn't reveal whether to address B.J. as Ms. or Mr. Nonetheless, I did find an address and an agency name. With that, I can find out a phone number, and with that, call and ask. Find out. Don't guess. Don't use a unisex or generic salutation. The salutation must be specific, with the proper title and end with a colon. It is a formal business letter.

Dear Ms. Johnson:

Lead, Log Line or Hook

The next part of a query is lead. Beginning with the hook, the log line. It is essence of the book in a single sentence.

Many of you are shaking your head. You're thinking it can't be done. Your story is too rich and complex to be reduced to a single sentence. Okay, I give up. I hope you remember your mother's address.

To begin, reduce the story to five sentences. Reduce the five sentences to two. Finally, reduce the two sentences to one. Is it easy? No. It is necessary? Yes, it is. You do want them read beyond the first sentence, don't you?

Many agents use interns to sort the wheat from the chaff. If you don't grab them in a positive way on the first sentence, the odds go against you exponentially. Remember, perfect is the minimum entrance fee.

 A sentence summarizing the Margaret Mitchell Pulitzer prize-winning novel of over 1000 pages might be said:

Gone with the Wind is a story that takes place during the Civil War and tells of a beautiful woman's obsession with the wrong man that blinds her to the love of the right man.

A thousand pages reduced to a single sentence. Can the sentence be improved? Of course it can. Nevertheless, it demonstrates it is possible to describe a complex and lengthy piece of fiction in a single sentence. Tell the essence of the story, not the story. Tell the theme of the story, not the story. Hook me. Make me want to read more. Give the publisher's salesperson a single line to entice the bookseller. Make it easy to want to read more, to sell the book, to buy the book. We all like easy money. Convince the reader of your query letter that he or she is on the path to easy money. Do it with craft. You must show, not tell.

Some lead openings immerse the reader in the story. Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged asks the question "Who is John Galt?" Would this induce the reader to read on? The hook provided by the publisher in advertising the book:

A mystery story not about murder of a man's body, but of the murder and eventual rebirth of his spirit.

Would you read on?

The first sentence of your novel must hook the reader. The first sentence of your query must also hook the reader. Now, here is the bad news. Each sentence thereafter must do the same, for perfection is the minimum entry fee. You can approach it with the one sentence synopsis, immersing the reader in the story, or presentation of a theme. The key is you must make it interesting and get the reader to read on. If your first sentence is boring, guess what the response will be.

Beyond the log line, you should describe the other details of the book, i.e., the number of words, any unique milieu, and the novel's genre. An example is:

Jaws, a 90,000 word thriller set in contemporary times in Cape Cod, tells the story of a local police chief's struggle to protect the town from a shark."

This is where you will part company with many agents. If you have written a historical romance, and the agent does only science fiction, horror, and basket weaving, there's a reject slip soon on its way.

Business Hook

The business hook is where you demonstrate your marketing skill. For example, in Formatting & Submitting Your Manuscript published by Writer's Digest Books, Nicholas Sparks, in an example query adds a P.S. to his query to an agent about his manuscript for The Notebook:

P.S. Because 22 percent of the people in this country (40+ million) are over 52 years old and 4.5 million people suffer from Alzheimer, this book is unique and marketable to a wide audience. In addition, at 52,000 words, it is short enough not to be cost prohibitive to most publishing houses.

The above business hook could have been in the lead; however, the author prior publishing credits fit better for him. This demonstrates professionalism, a commodity agents welcome.

 Writers Credentials

This where you tell them about the Pulitzer Prize you won. If you didn't win that, how about the East Podunk Short Story contest? If you belong to a writer's group or a critique group, put that down. If any of your work (fiction, nonfiction, articles, anything) has been published, put that here. If you have an MFA from UC Irvine, put that here. If you attended writer's conferences, seminars, or lectures, put that here. Put the most important first. If you have three books published, you may skip that you belong to the East Podunk's Writers Club. If your novel is a legal thriller, and you are a lawyer, put that down. Don’t put qualifications not related to your novel.

They need to validate you can put a sentence together and they don't want to the waste time to read your manuscript to find that you can't. If you are writing about a subject requiring some technical background, demonstrate you have that background. Give them that validation. The better the credentials, the easier the sell.

Referral or Recommendation Sources

Name-dropping is wonderful. If you know an author who has an agent, ask if he or she will introduce you. Ensure you note this in your query letter. For example:

A member of my critique group, John Smith, spoke highly of you and the quality of your representation. He thought My New Novel would be of interest to you.

Find books you like that are similar to yours. Look in the acknowledgements for the author's agent. When writing to this agent you can say something like:

I have read the suspense novel by John Bestselling Author, Absolutely Wonderful, in which he states he is with your agency. As a fan of his writing style, I felt that My New Novel would be of interest to you.

If you go to a writer's conference and meet an agent, mention this when writing to that agent:

We met at the Southern California Writer's Conference in Oxnard last summer. You might recall My New Novel placed second in the long fiction contest.

Comparisons with other Books

Using a positioning statement helps the agent pre-sell your book, if they choose to represent you. A typical positioning statement:

I try to emulate the plotting style of Ludlum and the technology exposition of Creighton.

Nevertheless, never compare yourself to some bestselling author in a way that claims equality to that famous author. Your claim will be rejected with a letter to follow. Be humble or be rejected.

Compare your novel to some other novels with a statement similar to:

My New Novel falls somewhere between The Lovely Bones and Angela's Ashes in style and content.

Fans of Danielle Steele will like My New Romance.

These statements help the reader understand the kind of novel you have written.

The Meat

Ok, the meat, or body of the letter should be your best foot forward. If the best pitch is your awards, education, writing experience, put that as your main pitch. If you lack significant creative writing credentials, pitch the story.

The meat is a few paragraphs. Brief is better. This is selling your credentials or story.

If the pitch is the story, give a brief synopsis of the story, its theme, and style. Most stories have been told before. Sure, the names have changed but the pitch is the same. Highlight the difference in your story. What makes this different and why will readers be intrigued and buy it? I know, your mom likes it.

The Closing Paragraph

The closing paragraph should be a standard business closing. For example:

Thanks for your consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.

A Representative Query

 Below, is an example of a query letter, written by a friend of mine for his novel, Singing to Whales. In the interest of privacy, the address and phone numbers have been changed.

John Doe
10 Main Street.
Somewhere, CA 93000
(866) 555-1212
E-mail: myEmail@domain.com

Ms. Mary Smith
The Mary Smith Agency
10 Main Street
New York, NY 10002

Dear Ms. Smith:

In Singing to Whales, Matt Kiley is born with the ability to talk with dolphins (and other whales) but he can’t carry a normal conversation with another human being to save his life.

Since a time even before he is born, Matt finds himself immersed in the world of dolphins and whales. His mother, a pioneering researcher in the 1950s, swims with the same dolphin for hours every day while pregnant. For the unborn Matt these swims muffle away all human sounds, filling his days instead with dolphin cries. These cries change the programming in Matt’s developing brain, affecting how he will come to process and understand language.

As he grows, Matt finds he can understand and even speak the dolphin language, which makes much more sense to him than English. Unfortunately, his troubled English results in some people labeling him an autistic savant, slow–witted with humans but brilliant with dolphins. The older he gets and the harder he works to talk and think like a human, the less he understands the dolphins and whales. Will he risk giving up his special gift in order to try to have a normal life?

The 100,000 words of Singing to Whales tells the story of one man’s ability to communicate with another species. Like The Horse Whisperer and Tarzan of the Apes, the human communication forms the soul of the story

I studied Oceanography in college. My studies continue, following dolphins in local waters, orcas off the San Juan Islands and humpbacks in Glacier Bay, where my novel takes place. I have written on water quality issues for an environmental organization, optioned screenplays to Tri-Star and Warner Bros., and written for the television shows “Star Trek, Voyager” and “Charmed”, among others. I serve as the senior editor of a local magazine.

Thank you for considering Singing to Whales.

Sincerely,

John Doe

Enclosures: Singing to Whales prologue and first fifty pages, synopsis, SASE

 Checklist

Finally, after you completed your query letter, send it to the right agent. Don't send it to someone who doesn't represent the category of your manuscript. If you've written a thriller, don't send it to the agent who does only nonfiction and children books. Agent Wizard is the best way to hook an agent...quick, efficient, and painless.